Captain Jack Harkness the holder of the Wolf
by Izzfrogger
Summary: 1st in 'The Bad Wolf' seires. Jack gets consumed by the power he holds. Reality is twisted, and sometimes things aren't the way they seem to be...slight JackGwen. Click on the title, go on, I dare you. Ps. PLEASE READ MESSAGE ON CHAP 4
1. Thoughts of an Immortal man

**Dear readers. this is a a short jack harkness fic, so please enjoy. this is a 'what if...'. please review!.**

**P.S. no flames or i will set my wolfie on you! -wolfie growls dangerously-**_  
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_Disclamier: I do not own torchwood, etc...  
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_I almost felt sick that I was like them – a stupid Human._

_A stupid, idiotic human. _

_Well, I suppose I couldn't really class myself as a human - unless it means an ex-time agent and con-man that has time-travelled in a blue police box with a time-lord._

_Oh yeah, did I forget? This 'Human' can never die._

_Bloody annoying, I'll tell you that! I can see it coming, every time._

_I can't count the times I've though (sardonically), 'Oh god, not again…!'_

_Not that I believe in any god. I mean, there might be a god, but who knows?_

_It was rumoured a couple of years ago that there was another race much more powerful then the Time lords, and maybe even the guardians, but I never really investigated it much. Maybe I should of, but it's no point now. I can't be bothered with it anymore. _

_The only people in this universe that have a sort of god-like power, would be the guardians, and the Time lords, which have all gone, except for one - I hope._

_(Even though I can never hope now, I'm too tired, to weary of this. So alone, so empty here)_

_I'm going to have a right go at him if I ever see him again. Bloody leaving me like that, but just maybe, it wasn't his fault. _

_Maybe he didn't know I was still alive. I mean, who'd ever heard of someone surviving a dalek's death-ray? _

_I'm stuck on this planet. I don't have anything again Earth, mostly because I was born here (obviously), but I just **had** to land in the 21st century didn't I?_

_It's like the middle ages! _

_I don't even know why I'm writing this. Probably all them reports my old boss made me do in the bloody time agency - not that I would even know after they stole 2 years of my memory. _

_Bastards._

_I'm so bored here. Torchwood's nothing compared to what it was like with the Doctor and Rose._

_I understand now. Why he is what he is. The Doctor._

_He was distant, hiding behind his cheery mask, hiding his pain and loss._

_Just like me._

_Living like this is almost like his life, but worse - Without time-travel. Just the slow path.  
_

_It could have been worse you say? Huh, don't make me laugh._

_(I try to think hopefully, but I can't do it. I'm so exhausted. I'm so tired of this life. )_

_It feels so lonely here… and cold, so cold. It's like an icy hand has smashed through my chest, and gripped my heart with such force it's painful._

_It's thawing fingers enveloping my heart. Piercing it. My chest feels empty now, nothing there, just coldness and hidden bitterness of my heart, and the shadow of death._

_It expands in me, reaching out like frozen tentacles. No matter what I do, it's always there, like a massive weight in my chest. _

_My thoughts are empty, still, like time._

_Even if my skin was burning, I'd still be cold - My chest, my body, and my feelings._

_It's too cold to think, or to do anything. It numbs my senses, and my emotions. But it never dulls my pain, or loss. My head is blank, and so are my emotions. _

_And all the time, that hand, it grips tighter and tighter, freezes my whole body, constricting my heart. _

_Even now as I look into a mirror and stare at my reflection, my eyes and my soul are bare, like a deserted wasteland. It's like a void of blackness consuming my heart, body, mind and soul._

_That's all there is._

_Emptiness._

_Time seems to just speed by you, never stopping. It seems to be going so fast, but so slow. _

_Everlasting._

_When I'm standing in one place it's like millions of years have gone by in that one minute. _

_I can feel it now. The earth spinning beneath me, rotating at a thousand times an hour, the entire planet hurtling round the sun at sixty-seven thousand miles an hour; never stopping._

_Time is like air as the whole existence of the universe seems to flash before my eyes as I stand there in the space of a second, and everything seems so still._

_It's moving so fast you can't even see it._

_It's like the whole world; the whole universe is pausing for a command, ever waiting. Ever still._

_And then I realize, in that space of a second, standing there – that it's waiting for a person. _

_The whole of space and time, stopping for that one person._

_And do you know who that one person is._

_Me._

_The bad wolf has returned…_

_----------bw------_

"Hey, Jack?" called Gwen.

Silence hung in the air, like a frosty chill.

"Jack?"

She peered curiously round the corner, her eyes scanning for the Captain. Her eyes locked on to the man she was looking for.

Jack had his back turned to her. She took a few nervous steps towards him. It was not like him to be quiet. He was standing still, staring off into space; an eerie, unnatural wind blew round him.

"Jack?"

No response.

"JACK!"

He slowly turned round.

'_Eventually!' _Gwen thought, half annoyed half glad at his response.

Jack looked into her eyes.

Her mouth dropped silently and her eye's widened in fear.

Jack's eye's glowed with a piercing light.

A golden mist swirled round him, his whole body radiating power.

Gwen dropped the coffee cup that she was carrying. The mug smashed on the floor, shattering into thousand of tiny pieces as the liquid formed a shimmering puddle.

There was a clattering of feet as the rest of the team appeared, wondering what all the noise was about.

"Gwen, what's wro…."

Owen's voice trailed off as he saw there leader, and there captain, surrounded by a veil of mist. He look liked he was possessed. The team paused.

"Who are you?" growled Owen, his gun pointing straight at the glowing Jack. He cautiously stepped forward, his eyes never leaving Jack - or whatever this creature was.

"ANSWER ME!" Owen yelled, angry, and scared shitless.

A voice echoed through the room. It was a voice laced with power – and it was Jack's.

"I am the controller of the sun and the sky, the moon and the stars, the light and dark. I can see the whole of space and time - every atom of the universe and its existence.

All that is, and all that was - All that ever could be.

Everything is still - space and time, life and death. All at my command,"

His voice was quiet but clear, and his eyes swirled with the vortex. His face echoed death and things unimaginable to the humans standing there. The whole team were frozen solid. Everything was silent. Not even the pterodactyl made a sound.

"I am the Bad Wolf!"

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**


	2. Thoughts of the Wolf

Disclaimer: Not mine, if it were I wouldn't just be dreaming and writing about it, would I?

I own nothin' exept the story, a thoughtful brain, and a laptop.

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"Jack…" whispered Gwen, horrified.

'_What has happened to you?' _

The vortex of wind swirled round the captain at impossible speeds. Gwen could feel the air slash her face viciously as it passed. She had to squint slightly to avoid the sharp stinging sensation that met her eyes. Jack's grey coat was flapping madly in the hurricane-like wind. Through all the sound and silence and the racing wind, he stood as calmly as ever, his eyes were filled with a golden swirling liquid that seemed to shimmer in the haze of the air stream.

"That's impossible," said Owen, his voice harsh and breathless. He started circling Jack like a hawk, his gun still pointed at him. Gwen could see the fear reflected in his eyes - In all of their eyes.

"Nothing is impossible Owen. I can see every single piece of the timeline, every life and every thing, and I can take it. I can bend it, snap it, or create a new one. I can do anything….."

The same eerie voice echoed round the hub. Jack wasn't Jack anymore. He was something different - something much more powerful and elusive. Was this the real Jack?

Owen stopped pacing there, and he held gun high and pointed straight at Jack. His hand was shaking. Fear ran through every cell in his body, and his mind screamed at him to run; to run and run, far away, and into the distance to the sinking sun - away from _him_. Whoever heno_, it _was.

Fear ran through Gwen, but she gritted her teeth. She couldn't loose Jack. Jack wouldn't do this to them…would he?

_NO_, she thought defiantly. _I don't know who or what he is, but I'm going to get Jack back. I have to. _

_Because if I lost him…__ I don't know what I'd do._

_-------------------_

Jack gazed at his team, the group of humans in front of him. It didn't seem like that though. He felt a million miles away. Thousands of cries of sound and millions of pictures and silent movies flashed before his eyes in a fluttering ribbon of senses, overrun by a beautiful singing that filled his chest, right up to his heart. He wasn't standing in the hub anymore – it had turned into a room of liquid gold. The floor was gold, the ceiling and walls were gold. He could vaguely recognise his team before him, which of who seemed tiny blurs of colour in the infinite room of the shimmering colour which seemed to go on for eternity.

He gazed at Gwen.

_Oh, little Gwen_. Images flashed before his eyes.

He was standing in an old morgue. A girl stood underneath an archway, blue light enveloping her, Gelth destroyed by the time war streaming out before her, around her. Her name drifted into his mind.

Gwyneth.

She was exactly like Gwen. More images thundered down into his head like the heavy pounding of rain.

Pictures and memories flashed before his eyes - Gwen smiling, laughing, crying, and staring into the distance.

The sounds and senses that she could feel, he could feel them as well. He could feel Rhys warm hands against her body, the rain across her face, the fear running down her spine as she lay in a converter in the Torchwood basement, and the cold metal securing her head to the machine.

He could even feel her fear now. She was standing there, in the hub – their hub, he couldn't help but think.

But he knew he didn't belong here anymore. He was no longer one of them.

He could feel her fear vividly, and the fear of the others in the room. They were scared of him. He gazed sadly at them. He felt himself drift further away from them. His heart stung. Or was it his head? He couldn't tell anymore. Pain thudded down on him. The raindrops of thought had turned into deadly hail, battering him further down into the golden haze that made the floor. He could feel the darkness beyond it. He struggled to push up against it, but it was no use. For the first time, he felt a flicker of fear. He tried pushing, slightly desperately again with all his might, but it didn't work, the light was engulfing him. And so was the dark of the beyond. He was helpless.

'Jack?'

A faraway voice penetrated the flow of burning pain. The voice came back stronger.

'Jack?'

A ragged gasp came from Jack as he felt the light relive some pressure off him. A blurred face came into view.

'Gwen…?'

'Jack, come back.'

He felt himself being pulled up. Gwen's face was clear now. It almost seemed strange Gwen's head surrounded by light.

'Let it go,' she said softly. The pressure relieved itself on his body, and he finally felt free. He could feel the energy in his control again. He felt so…..alive!

He could see Gwen fully now, right down from her head to her shoes, back grounded in the gently glowing light and the oh-so-beautiful music that had seemed to appear. It echoed like a song lost in time. He could feel her holding his hands tightly beside himself.

For the first time in what felt like an age, Jack smiled, looking down at Gwen. It was a true smile.

'How can I let go of this?'

'Jack, you HAVE to let go!' she said, pain and filling her eyes.

'I won't,' he said resolutely. There was no humour in his golden orbs.

'Jack!' She said sternly.

'That's not going to work. I can control everything, even what you think.'

'No, Jack, you can't. Nobody can do that. Even if they can, it's not RIGHT!'

Jack frowned at Gwen. '…Why?'

Gwen looked desperately into his confused eyes, searching for something. She had to do something, anything. Suddenly an absurd idea came into her head. If Jack gave people life by kissing them, maybe she could take the energy out of him and dispose of it the same way somehow…

Jack stared at Gwen, the background of the blazing room illuminating her like an angel. She leaned closer. Jack was transfixed. She was so very near to him; he could feel her breath on his face, which suddenly seemed unnatural in this liquid gold room. She was millimetres away from his lips. He couldn't draw his gaze away from her, and some part of him knew that she couldn't take her eyes off his either. The golden voices seemed to be running away behind him, fading, telling him to follow them, but he didn't. His eyes were fixed on Gwen's soft chocolate coloured orbs as she slowly leaned forward and pressed her lips against his.

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Sorry for the wait.

Intrested?

R&R!!!


	3. Thoughts of confusion

_Sorry for the late (and kind of short) update and soz if there's any spelling or grammar mistakes!_

_Trolls will be banned. (Flamers with no reason to flame) _

_Last time__ on 'Captain Jack Harkness the holder of the Wolf: Gwen's lips pressed hard against Jack's…_

* * *

'What the hell's she doing?' growled Owen. 

The team were still standing back from the glowing, swirling vortex surrounding the two people in the centre of the littered Hub. They could feel the heat on their faces from the strange unnatural light as they stood there and stared, with their hearts pumping, at the strange and somehow frightening scene before them.

One of Gwen's hands was tangled Jack's hair, while the other one was on his shoulder. Their lips were pressed together along with the rest of their bodies. Jack's eyes were closed as he hung onto Gwen tighter. His face seemed almost calm and peaceful. Gwen's sad, brown eyes closed as their mouths parted and their tongues entwined.

She was scared, so scared. Her heart was beating so fast. Was this the end? What if this didn't work? What if... Jack died? What if this was the end, and he didn't come back this time? Why couldn't of she saved him before? Did he know about this all along? Why didn't he tell her? Was he afraid? So many doubts ran through her head, and she began to feel light. And tired, god, she felt so tired, she just wanted to fall and relax in those strong arms that were around her. When did those arms embrace her anyway?

The warmth of his tongue and lips disappeared, to leave cold air in its place.

It took a moment to realize her arms were embracing him too. Her eyes cracked open, to stare right into Jack's sad, smiling face.

'I'm sorry,' he whispered. A single tear ran down his cheek. Her eyes found his. The blinding light was still there, still burning as brightly as the sun. It was only as she looked deeper into those eyes that she saw a reflection herself. Her eyes glowed calmly back at her. It was only then she realized, with a shock, what had happened. This had been her plan, but Jack was still there, he was still glowing. Why was he still glowing? Why was he crying? And why did her head hurt so much?

She blinked. Her eyes didn't change back. She looked wildly around, maybe someone….

She froze. She wasn't in the hub anymore. It was a room, but she couldn't tell how big it was. She couldn't tell the roof from the floor or the side from the side. It was like she was suspended in a golden gas somewhere. From somewhere, a beautiful, haunting song echoed through the mist. Whispers hissed around her quietly like a pan of boiling water in the strange room. It was oddly... peaceful.

Jack's voice broke the silence. 'I'm so sorry,' he whispered again. 'This is my entire fault.'

'No,' she said. Her voice wasn't angry or worried, just…calm. Why did she feel so calm?

The pain was gradually going. 'I shouldn't have let you do this,' he said quietly. His arms that were embracing her tightly suddenly let go, accompanied with a sharp gasp of pain.

'Jack?' she asked, scared. It showed in her voice this time. Gwen's body was enveloped in an unnatural cold temperature as Jack stumbled back in pain.

'Stay away,' he gasped hoarsely, sticking out his shaking hand to stop her advancing. His sight was swimming; all the colours of the rainbow seemed to be mixing. Pain was searing through his whole body. It was engulfing him. Oh god it hurt. It burned his skin. His eyes flickered up, unfocused. Gwen.

'What's happening to me?' He gasped. All the information, all the knowledge of the golden room was disappearing - fading away. Why was it fading? He couldn't understand. He was immortal. This shouldn't be happening. He should be able to hold all this. Why was this happening?

His knees slammed against the metal floor – the hub floor. He looked dizzily up. Suddenly he felt his muscles contract. Every single one. Pain exploded in every fibre of his body and a scream tore itself from his throat. His whole body felt like it was burning, but it was worse that that. Much worse. Anger rampaged through his body and mind, consuming him along with the pain.

As suddenly as it began, the pain froze. The anger didn't though. It kept on raging, growing and growing until his vision was blurred tinted blue. He stood up effortlessly, a strange power flowing through his veins - An overwhelming power pushing him forward. His whole body was aching. His blood boiled. He could feel a growl come from his panting lips and his teeth were bared as he paced slowly towards the girl. His powerful muscles flexed. Everything was seen that slightly distorted, tinted blue hue now and the golden room had gone. Gwen stumbled away from him, the golden light around her gone. Jack could smell the fear, taste it almost. God, she smelled so delicious. Drawl dripped from his mouth. He could eat her. Literally.

It started with a few steps, and before he knew it he was running, and he was tearing into that oh-so-sweet, flawless skin. Beautiful red liquid splattered everywhere along with the sound of the distant screams as he savoured her. Long yellow nails sunk deeply into her blood-stained skin, gripping her tightly. With a quick movement, he yanked his un-human hand back, his nails still attached firmly. A scream of pain and agony echoed like a forgotten song in his keen ears as her flesh was torn from her frame. Her peppery-tasting veins were gouged out along with the rest of it, filling him, quenching his thirst and feeding his hunger. Her flesh was soft and stringy and her bones made a satisfying crunch with the glorious red sauce. He gulped down the sweet tasting organs that were ripped up along with the rest of the body. He was still hungry though, still so very hungry.

He let the bloodied carcass drop to the floor, chewed up into a pulpy mess, and turned to see the rest of the team there quivering. Two words registered in his mind – _I'm hungry_. His mouth curled into a vicious smile as he pounced.

He never noticed the reflection of a huge golden wolf gorging on its prey on a lone monitor.

* * *

Shafts of morning light fell and gently scattered across the floor of the Hub as the faint sounds of birds-song drifted through the thick and still air of the unnaturally silent building. 

The fist thing Jack was aware of was the cold metal grid of the floor pressed against his face. There was a strange tingling smell in the air. A shiver ran through his body as he realized how cold it was. His tired blue eyes cracked open slowly and they met the first rays of light dancing on the floor. The red floor, he noticed. His heart skipped a beat.

_NO!_

He scrambled up, panicked, staring at horror at the nightmarish scene before him. The whole room was splattered with blood. It covered the bottom of the walls and the monitors, and the grid on the floor was stained completely red, along with bits of flesh and parts of bodies fling everywhere.

His eyes wildly scoured the floor. One, two, three…four. Oh god. They were dead. All his team, they were all dead He took a few shaky breaths, his eyes wide and body shaking; he staggered up to one of the corpses, and fell to his knees beside it on the damp ground. He reached out with his shaking hand, but drew it back quickly when it came in touch with the sticky blood of the corpse. All the skin had been ripped off the person, including some of the meat and the guts. A few strands of long hair lay across the skeletons disfigured face. They were black. That meant…

'Gwen?' he whispered, horrified. Had he done this? He looked down slowly at his shaking body. His clothes were soaked with blood. It didn't take an expert to realize the blood wasn't his. He looked at his hands. Bits of flesh were stuck underneath his nails. He looked around the hub then back at Gwen. A small, broken whisper cracked through the silence.

'What have I done?'

* * *

Jack's eyes snapped open. Sweat coated his clothes and body. Scared eyes met concerned soft brown ones. 

'Gwen!?'_ But…that's impossible!_ _Was that… just a dream?_

He gasped out in pain and shock. His whole body felt like it was on fire. He looked wildly around. He was in the hub. There was no blood. The whole team was gathered round him. Ianto had a look of relief, Owen looked worried, and Tosh had a look of both worry and relief. Jack tried to sit up but his wrists were strapped tightly with metal cuffs to the autopsy table. Another blast of jagged pain shot through him.

'Jack!' Gwen breathed, relieved. A small smile broke out across her face.

'What happened?' he coughed out. A look of confusion applied it's itself on to Jack's hansome, painfilled face. Gwen softly put her hand on his shoulder as her soft, calming husky voice traveled through the hub.

'You were bitten by a werewolf on our trip to Scotland, remember?'

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MUHAHAHAHA! Cliffhanger (sort of!)

If any of you are confused, don't worry, it'll all be explained in the next chap….

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	4. Thoughts of the TruthPT1

_Italics_ Flashbacks or thoughts. can also be normal meaning of emphasis etc.

**URGENT NOTICE-PLEASE READ!: **

**I DONT THINK THIS CHAPTER FLOWS AS WELL WITH THE REST OF THE CHAPTERS, SO WHEN YOU START READING THIS CHAPTER, PLEASE TELL ME IMMEDIATLY IF YOU THINK I SHOULD TAKE IT DOWN AND RE-WRITE IT TO FIT IN TO THE PREVIOUS STYLE. IT JUST FEELS WRONG READING ALL THE WAY THOUGH IT, BUT I DONT WANT TO TAKE IT DOWN IF OTHER PEOPLE ENJOY THIS.**

**EVEN IF YOUR READING THIS RANDOMLY, PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT THE ABOVE. If you were gripped by one style and kept loosing concentration on the other, please tell me! Shall I delete this (both parts)?**

A/N: SO sorry for extremely late update –bangs head against door-

I was assaulted by many other plot bunnies. I hope this chapter will satisfy you, as I haven't written this stuff in a while! Sorry! Enjoy.

Ps. Sorry for all O.O.C.ness and grammar/spelling mistakes! I haven't managed to watch a Torchwood episode for ages T.T I can't wait for the 2nd season!

PPs. Any thoughts for improvement will be gladly appreciated. If you do spot mistakes, please message me super quick then I can correct them ;)

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**QuickRecap:**

_After woken from a strange and rather disturbing dream, Jack finds himself chained down to the autopsy table in the hub with his team gathered around him._

'_Jack!' Gwen breathed, relieved. A small smile broke out across her face._

'_What happened?' Jack asks, confused._

_Gwen softly put her hand on his shoulder as her soft, calming husky voice traveled through the Hub._

'_You were bitten by a werewolf on our trip to Scotland, remember?'_

**_Chapter 4-Thoughts of the Truth_**

'No! What are you talking about?' he answered breathlessly, pulling an even more bewildered expression as her words started to sink in.

'Jack, do you know the date?' Gwen said softy, testing how much he could remember.

Jack paused then…'How the hell am I supposed to know that?'

Gwen twitched and mentally noted never to wake Jack up in the mornings, if he ever slept that is. But now he was awake, and nothing could stop the relief flooding through her systems. She put a warm, comforting hand on his shoulder, and squeezed it gently. She wasn't sure whether it was a reassuring gesture or just a test to prove to herself that Jack was still there.

'What's the last thing you remember?'

Jack was too lost in his thoughts to reply he hastily tried to unscramble everything in his head. _I was bitten by a werewolf? Maybe that's why I had that gory dream. That's not good, but I haven't done any damage yet, have I? So me …eating them was a dream? That was all it was_…

Jack gazed back at Gwen, and he couldn't help but let a faint hint of relief connect him to the world as he realized Gwen had placed a small, affectionate hand on his shoulder.

He winced slightly as another shot of pain sliced through his body, but thankfully it wasn't as strong as before. At least he was safe now for the moment, with his team there in his home. His body relaxed somewhat, greatful that they were there for him.

The immortal suddenly realized Gwen was still waiting for his answer, so he hurriedly thought back through his hazy mind to the last thing he remembered. The first thing that came into his head was the dead bodies of the Torchwood team in the gore-covered Hub. His body went cold and his muscles started to tense. He swiftly moved past that blood-filled memory, to before that event. He moved further to when he arrived back in Torchwood.

He had come back from the Master's grip in the 'The year that never was' to Torchwood, and went back to his team that were so unaware of what could have befallen them in this year. Well, at least they had a better deaths then him….

He shook his head mentally, knowing he shouldn't think like that. His team had helped defend the Earth with their lives. They didn't deserve pain filled deaths, unlike _himself_. His blood stirred. He sometimes wondered why the Doctor didn't just let him have his own way with the bloody Master (_but the blood was always belonged to me, 'the freak', didn't it?_).

He shook inwardly, and shoved back the dark and torturous memories forcing their way to the front of his mind; half wishing he could use retcon. But Jack wasn't ignorant. He knew he couldn't stand another void in his memory, especially where his answer about his life had been answered. Now the Doctor had flown and almost all of his questions had been answered, he only had one important thing left - His team, and he was determined to enjoy every last second he had with them.

Jack shuddered again as pain raked through him once more. He forcefully tried to relax his muscles that time.

Supirsingly, his team had seemed to miss him that week (a long year to Jack) and Jack wondered whether they had missed him quite as much as he had missed them. He was secretly glad he had someone, something he could protect and cherish, at least for a while.

Jack closed his eyes._ Focus._ Ok. So he had arrived back to his team at Torchwood 3. That's right – A week after, when everything had settled back to normal, he went to investigate strange goings-on in Scotland with his team. He frowned and focused, but he could only grasp snippets of memory; a blurry view of a large house, snatches of colour, running along corridors, and the moon had been round and full, as he remembered staring at it; its lonely beauty captured in the velvet darkness…pain searing through his body. Then there was nothing.

His eyes opened again. If that was the memory werewolf attack, why couldn't he remember it fully? Had the attack really been that bad?

And after the snippets of memory had been, he must have fallen into the dream while he was presumably unconscious from the attack. In the dreamscape he had found himself somehow standing in the Hub, thinking about the 21st century. Then there had been a bright light with that beautiful singing, a timeless, haunting song; then Gwen had kissed him, and he found a strange power, and he had …killed them - massacred them. He had murdered Yan and Tosh and Owen. Slaughtered _her - _his Gwen who believed in him, helped him, and was now staring comfortingly down at him; and he had not even tried to stop himself from ripping her up with relish - _eating_ and savoring her like a wild, vicious beast. At that moment, he couldn't find the courage to look back into Gwen's trusting eyes. He angrily pushed by that memory out of his mind, not trying to stop the shame that splayed in his shattered heart. He made his way to the last memory.

It was when he had been in the gore-stained Hub, and then he woke up here - in _his_ Torchwood, clean and with each one of his team alive and kicking, although he wasn't too happy about the strange pain in his body or being strapped to a table, for all the BAD reasons. He defiantly knew he preferred the latter to be real, and thankfully, it looked like it was, which meant he had just been dreaming.

He let out a soft sight of relief. _All a dream…. _His eyes flickered shut to catch a moment of a peaceful abyss, before once again opening to face the world.

'I…can't remember what happened. But I remember arriving back here before going to Scotland,' he answered for once. He didn't mention any dream. Sometimes it was necessary to keep secrets. Ok, so he hadn't technically lied about that, he just hadn't told them. It didn't matter if they didn't know what it was entirely about, did it?

The immortal didn't understand the dream himself. Not because of what happened in it, but because it had never happened. Jack never _dreamt_ like most people. Nowadays, after what had happened on the Game Station, all he saw when he slept was his bloody memories - literally. So how could he have dreamt something that never happened? On top of that, even if the dream was caused by the werewolf, some of the dream hadn't even been connected to the wolf, so what was the golden light about? What had happened to him to make his have these… dreams? Well, more like nightmares.

Gwen brought Jack back from his thoughts as she frowned, worried, and Jack, with a sinking feeling right to the floor, could tell she didn't believe him one bit. _Well, at least one person on my team is inquisitive, although with all the wrong ideas_ he thought_ – trying to find out about **me**_. Her deep brown eyes somehow pierced Jack's - Those brown eyes in his dream that stared up at him as they kissed in the golden light. Brown – the colour of dried blood...

…_he was tearing into that oh-so-sweet, flawless skin. Beautiful red liquid splattered everywhere along with the sound of the distant screams… He could feel the warm blood rushing down his throat. It was soothing, and deliciously rich._

His breath hitched painfully and he inwardly cursed the savage pleasure he felt. He averted his gaze quickly to the roof as his eyes stung with something he had not felt in a while - unshed tears. He reminded himself it was only a dream. _I'm not that weak, not this weak. I can't show these faults in front of my team, I'm their leader. I always have to be strong_. It wasn't just the physical pain that made his body ache. All these memories, they were just too much for him. Even the ones that weren't real.

Currently, he couldn't bare to look into the relieved and believing eyes of his group. That dream was fresh in his mind and kept on repeating like a mantra. How he killed them, ripped them apart and feasted on them like it was the most normal thing in the world. But the worst part of it was the pleasure he had felt. It was savage, hungry, the very basic emotions of a bloodthirsty animal. He felt sick with himself. He was a 51st century guy, _51st century_. Maybe that's where the savageness came from though. It was just a dream, but he couldn't even stop himself. _Maybe the Doctor is right. I AM wrong. _

Disgust filled him, fueled by his ever-lasting ribbon of pain. _Is that what I am going to become, or am I already at that stage?_

-----------

Gwen glanced at the rest of the team, who were oddly silent while they sighed in relief; it almost seemed they were more panicked than Jack about the incident.

He seemed to have calmed down for the moment, or at least hidden his panic. She was quite surprised at his panicked reaction when he woke up – Jack was always calm and strong. But then again, he had been ripped open by a werewolf….she shuddered and closed her eyes momentarily at the memory. Not even Jack could be so emotionless about that.

It seemed Owen, Tosh, and even Ianto believed Jack's answer. She sighed and looked back at him. He was looking at anything but her and the rest of the team, and her cop senses screamed at her. They knew when they saw a guilty person.

_But what's he guilty about? He saved us from the werewolf and almost killed himself in the process. He can't be guilty about that, can he? It must be something after that attack. What did he see when he was unconscious that make him act like this?_ It did make an understandable logic. They all saw Jack had been had having nightmares after he had been unconscious since the attack. They guessed it was the werewolf bite infecting him. It hadn't been much; just the odd groan or mutter or gasp, although he had lashed out once or twice dangerously. It scared her to see him like that, so out-of-control. She sometimes wondered whether he realized his strength. He could have hurt himself or someone else. Why did you think he was handcuffed to the autopsy table?

'How did I get bitten?' Jack promptly snapped her out of her thoughts.

----------------------

Owen had a quip on the tip of his tongue (such as 'How d'ya think?') but wisely decided to keep quiet, as he remembered the awful sight of Jack getting ripped into. Jack had been such an idiot hurting himself to defend them. Owen knew he should have been able to protect the team himself, he was 2nd in charge. He hadn't even been able to do that. Owen turned back to the team and resumed hitting the keyboard keys with unneeded force as he typed in Jack's medical condition so far onto the computer.

---------------------------------

Nobody answered Jack's question. Jack felt awkward in the stony silence, only broken by the odd caws of Myfanwy and the typing of Owen's keyboard. He shifted on the smooth, metal table again, wishing they would remove the metal cuffs strapping him helplessly down. It wasn't exactly a pleasant sensation, seeing as he has spent a none-existent year chained up with the alike of them, but unfortunately he knew that if the 'werewolf' attack had changed him, it would not be good. Especially as what happened in his dream could easily happen here in real life.

----

Jack finally got his question answered after a 7 smothering seconds. Gwen took few deep breaths then started reciting carefully what had happened. Even if he was immortal, he still had feelings, no matter what crap Owen had said once. Actually, she was rather surprised (and admittedly relieved) that he hadn't said a word yet. Gwen had learnt several things after a few weeks of working at Torchwood. One of them: Owen tended to say the wrong things to reassure injured people.

She glanced over to him to be met with the back of his grey t-shirt as he typed Jack's medical information into his computer. She looked back down to Jack, who was looking rather uncomfortable strapped down (surprising, as she remembered hearing some of his suggesting innuendos), but he settled down quickly and she started.

'A 2 weeks ago, just after you came back to Torchwood after going missing,' _without even TELLING us where you had bloody been,_ she growled mentally… although, if someone could read her thoughts, they might just catch a glimpse of her badly hidden worry and fear. She sent a look at Jack, silently reprimanding his ways.

Jack finally managed to look back at her without thinking of the dream. He could easily tell she still held some resentment against his secretive ways - especially not telling them where he had been for a 'week'; they were content, although angry when he came back, and they thankfully fell back into the old way of their teamwork after an a little more than an innuendo as an explanation.

That's why Jack wasn't going to risk messing up the timeline once more by telling them about the year that never was. His decicion was for their safety. He had no idea how much damage it could cause-maybe major, maybe none. But last time he has done something like that… well let's just say things didn't go as planned – and that time he had a Chula war ship and a _fully_ working time watch-com. He was sure he didn't have them now. (Not since the Doctor had ruined his watch…)

---

Gwen remembered how she had found the week when he'd been away was hell without anyone to lead the team, especially as the damage to the rift had increased because of the Abbadon. She remembered how glad she was when Jack came back - she didn't think she could have stood a day more of being the leader. It was harder and exhausting then it looked. Gwen blinked back to the present. She scolded herself for letting her thoughts wander off, (a/n like the author!) and continued with her recital.

'Before we knew it, we were being chased by a werewolf. You had wandered off somewhere and we couldn't contact you,' A hint of frustration in her voice. Jack interrupted then.

'Were any of you hurt?' Gwen shook her head and continued with the story, smiling slightly at his concern for them.

'At the last moment, when we were cornered, and are bullets had ran out, it charged at us. You suddenly jumped out from another corridor in front of it. You saved us, but it didn't stop and it had its jaws open and it went right at you and it ...' She trailed off and paled considerably.

Jack winced slightly, suddenly feeling glad he couldn't remember. Getting ripped up wasn't his idea of a great day out. _Maybe that's why can't I remember what happened. If that's the case, I only have short-term memory loss. I should get the memory back soon enough. Though at this point in time I'm not sure I want it._

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next part of chap--


	5. Thoughts of the TruthPT2

Part 2

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Gwen had seemed it clamp up at the memory. Tosh, who had suddenly summond up the courage to speak, seemed to snap the Captain out of thought. 'We managed to stun it before it … killed you. It's locked in the cells now. You had some bad injures, so,' her voice quavered slightly, 'we returned here. You've been unconscious for 6 days.' She hesitated again.

Jack's expression softened slightly. Watching someone you know getting torn up could leave a scar on anyone. He knew that by experience - he was only a teenager when the enemy tortured his best friend to death. His eyelids slid shut as they tried to hide his eyes from the reminders of what had happened that time.

'Your body structure is changing into one of a werewolf,' Owen eventually spoke, now facing him. Jack met his gaze with an open-eyed one.

_That means a haemovariform creature, doesn't it? Wasn't it killed when it tried to take over Queen Victoria? That was how Torchwood was formed. __How come there is still one here on earth? _

'So I'm a … werewolf?' asked Jack, a sick feeling building in his stomach. _Oh great, not only can I not die, but now I'm a lupine-wavelength haemovariform to give it its proper name._ Contempt was laced with loathing in his inner voice. _Is a mindless killing machine what I will become? Well, that does explain those dreams. The wolf's character and lust must have already infected my body and even some of my mind. How long will it take for my dream to become true, how long be before I break and loose control completely?_

'…and you could also have a physic connection to the wolf or have the wolf's memories,' _or possibly both,_ 'but I'm not too sure…' he paused. 'Tosh looked it up on the Torchwood database, but there's not much information written about it.'

Jack sighed softly. _Great, more sleepless nights of torment. _'Can you get an antidote for it?'

'It could be possible. We need the results back to confirm it though.' Owen shook his head, turned round and started typing again.

'Results?'

There was a loud beep from one of Tosh's computers. Tosh ran up the mini stairway from the autopsy table and the team to her workstation, speaking as she went. 'We didn't want to risk taking blood from you or taking you to the hospital for that matter (too many questions), you where in a bad state.'

Jack craned his neck to glance down at his body, still lying down. The sight that stared back at him did explain the shots of pain earlier._ So that's what had hurt._ Most of his skin neck down had been wrapped in bandages, especially around his chest. He was completely naked except for some black boxers he had been wearing. Covering a portion of his legs was a white sheet. The whole look reminded him of a mummified 'Egyptian'. He would have laughed if the situation hadn't been so serious. How did these humans think of a name like that?

'Because of the werewolf's natural healing ability, the wounds should clear up in a week or so.' Tosh continued with her speech, typing madly on her keyboard. 'We took some data from the werewolf and compared it to yours.'

Jack froze and suddenly looked very serious 'Me?'

Silence never seemed so dominating. Tosh gave a quick, nervous glance at him, stationary for a moment with her 'deer-caught-in-the-headlights' eyes.

'You have my DNA?'

Tosh looked bit her lip but stood defiantly. Her tongue darted out, wetting her dry lips. 'We took some of you hair when you're asleep. It was necessary'

Jack didn't speak for a while

'We had to get your DNA.' Surprisingly, this time it was Owen that spoke, who was still typing, back turned towards the others. 'Trying to get remedy might take a few days or more. We need to find the difference between your DNA and the Werewolf's DNA to find a solution that will destroy the werewolf cells in your body and not yours. If you're not alien, you should have nothing to worry about.' The unspoken comparison was clearly treacherous - 'If you are an alien, you're going to have a lot to worry about.' Owen glanced up at Tosh, who was staring wide-eyed at the computer. She glanced down at the rest of the team.

'What have you got?' called Owen.

Tosh shook her head, disbelievingly. Jack felt uncomfortable at the odd sense of foreboding in the Hub. Not for the first time he wasn't in control of the situation and he didn't enjoy it. 'The first part of his DNA looks human, but it's slightly different. It seems to be constructed with some different chemicals compared to ours. It seems to have some extra enzymes I've never seen before.' Owen quickly appeared next to her to look at the picture of Jack's DNA strand himself. They went silent for a while, engrossed in one of Jack's secrets that had finally been uncovered.

-----------------

'Take the cuffs off me,' Jack ordered to Gwen. She looked from Owen to him, uncertain. 'I want to have a look for myself.' She waved, but stayed stationary, doubtful. 'I wouldn't hurt you - any of you.' Jack knew that he was lying through his teeth as he remembered his dream, and what a bastard he used to be before he met Rose and the Doctor, but years of experience gave him a good guise. He lied to himself a bit longer, convincing himself he would never purposely hurt them.

He managed to look so sincere, that Gwen couldn't help but finally trust him again. He _was_ still her boss. She took the key from a nearby worktop, beside some medical equipment. _Not very well hidden_, Jack mused as Gwen disappeared behind him. His eyes turned to Ianto, who had, surprisingly, moved behind Toshiko and Owen to look at his DNA results as well.

Ianto hadn't spoken since he had woken up. Jack wondered if he was ok. Ianto always seemed to have more depth then the others. He seemed to notice the unnoticed. Had he noticed something about Jack's different behavior after he had returned? Had he noticed that many of Jack's smiles and laughs never reached his eyes anymore?

Jack didn't have anymore to ponder as he was released. The manacles clinked as they sprung open. Jack gratefully sat up and rubbed his sore wrists. He swung his feet from under the sheets then over the table and they connected to the floor with a quiet thump - Jack winced slightly as pain ran through his legs. He limped as fast as he could with his stiff and pain-filled body up the stairs, seemingly unconcerned about his almost naked, bandaged covered appearance. He emerged next to Owen, with Gwen behind him.

His team stared at Jack, as though expecting him to say something. Instead he leaned forward to get a better view of the monitor. Displayed on the screen was a 2 colourful, hovering, twisted DNA strands, almost identical. Two samples they had taken of him. He had never really looked at his own DNA like this before. He trailed his finger slowly down the picture of the molecules, aware of everyone watching him.

Jack had seen this sort of thing before, although not often. There didn't seem anything unusual about it. Admittedly, it did have a few parts that a 21st human didn't have, but that wasn't of any concern. What was interesting was that the entire structures of both strands seemed to have a golden tinge to them, even though very faint. It reminded him of the nanogenes in his old Chula warship. Jack rightly guessed that it was part of the vortex that was deep within him, keeping him alive.

_You're an impossible thing Jack…_

His finger trailed smoothly down the screen before coming to an abrupt halt on some purple structure which was not tinged with gold.

'Those are the werewolf genes I believe sir,' Ianto slipped in. Jack nodded, but his eyes had suddenly noticed something else aberrant on the other strand. With a quick glance, he confirmed it to be the same as the other strand, but it didn't look human. Something was wrong. A part on both DNA strands looked slightly different then the rest of the DNA. Jack frowned. He tapped the screen on one of the strands. 'Give me a close up of that.'

Jack was right. Unlike the rest of the structure, this part of the DNA was made up of oddly-shaped blue and brown parts, which were also not tinged.

Jack moved out of the way as Owen peered closer. He pulled back after a few seconds. 'Alien genes.' He announced, and then looked accusingly at Jack.

'Alien genes? I'm not an alien.' He laughed. 'Well, not to you lot.' Team avoided his steadily growing incredulous stare. They didn't believe him. They actually thought he was an alien! Well sure, he wasn't human anymore, what human could come back to life? But he defiantly wasn't alien. And what was even worse, the team weren't happy with him at all. _This is gonna take a lot of convincing._

'Look,' he said, suddenly not in the mood for laughing. 'I shouldn't have any alien genes. I was born completely human. Are you _sure_ they're not the werewolf genes?' Tosh couldn't help but notice it was Jack who was looking nervous now. She nodded in faintly. 'One of the DNA strands I got wasn't infected yet by the werewolf.'

Jacks mouth went completely dry. She must be wrong, maybe she made a mistake. He desperately tried to find a loophole, but to no avail. There wasn't one. Now not only had the team got his unnatural, (_51st centaury_) advanced DNA on their database, but he had an alien gene that he never remembered having. Plus now his team didn't trust him. Their stares burned him, but he hardly noticed. '_An alien gene that I never remembered having…' _The colour drained completely out of his face. He was positive he had never had an alien gene in his lifespan from any life forms. '_Never remembered_…' There was only one answer to that…but it was impossible…right? Unless...

What if when Rose had brought him back to life, there was a tiny possibility that she hadn't just brought him back to life on the Gamestaion and the events after, but she had gone back and revived him in his past. But that meant…

And on that basis, Jack's realization slowly sank in as he finally figured out what had probably happened in those 2 missing years of memory.

Jack didn't move. He couldn't. His whole body went numb and frozen for what seemed like a life-age, but must have been mere moments. Something had happened. Some alien DNA had been injected into him without his knowing. And there was only two years of missing memory in which that could have happened. And if that was true, it meant... He had become an experiment to the agency. Jack gut dropped down to his feet. Who wouldn't want to experiment with a man who couldn't be killed permently? And one of the main ways of experimenting in the TA was torture. Suddenly, Jack realized that maybe he didn't want his memories back.

--------------------------

Jack looked like he had been hit by a bus. He stared unblinking into empty space with rarely seen looks of shock and horror and fear expressed on his unmoving, colourless face.

'Jack?' He flinched away from Gwen's worried touch, not even glancing at her. 'Jack, say something.' Her eyes widened with worry. She had never seen Jack like this. Had they found out his secret, was he really an alien. Questions swirled round like a vortex in her head.

_How could they_. Jack closed his eyes for a moment, composing himself. He eventually got himself together again and opened his eyes. But his composition didn't play right. He slowly gritted his teeth grinding them savagely and shook slightly. His hands clenched into fists on the table. The conclusion was true, there was no other option. There was only one thing on his mind at that moment – revenge. _When I find those memories_ _those bastards will pay for what they did._

Only Owen noticed a little box appear in the corner of one of Tosh's monitors. He clicked on it silently, frowning as he read the results of his other test_. It seems like the werewolf gene is rapidly growing in Jack ... it won't be long until he is completely consumed. Jack is getting more dangerous with each passing second._ _Adding an extra unidentified alien gene to this mix doesn't exactly make this whole thing simpler_.He exited the box and it disappeared.

Unnoticed, he discreetly slipped a needle by the desk into his pocket and inconspicuously walked round until he was behind Jack. Their captain didn't even have enough time to realize what had happened to stop Owen. He groaned and fell limply to the metal grated ground. Owen took the now empty needle out of his leader's arm.

The team stared at him, flabbergasted and speechless. Well, nearly. 'What the hell have you done?!' Snapped Gwen, outraged and as shocked as her co-workers.

'Calm down, it's only a sedative. It should keep him knocked out for a while.' Owen stared up at the team who (luckily for Owen) seemed too shocked to react against him. Owen skillfully used the short time he had to explain whey he had drugged Jack, keeping himself between the team and Jack's prone form. It was the most effective way to make everyone else listen.

'The werewolf gene is like a virus. The captain's infection is progressing more rapidly then I thought. We don't have long until he fully becomes a werewolf. With the unknown alien DNA in his system and the bad mix of high stress situations, it makes the body depend more on the werewolf gene inside to protect and attack, making the infection stronger and faster-progressing. I don't know whether Jack was telling the truth, or he really is half-alien and hiding it, but we need to make sure he doesn't get stressed. But we need to know who the he is first.' He paused and looked seriously round at them. 'I know your not brave enough to say it, but I know I've had enough innuendo rubbish from Jack. We work under him and don't even know his real name.'

'That's the way he likes it though,' said Ianto quietly.

Owen glared him. 'It's not the way I like it! Even you, Ianto, must have wondered about Jack. Who he is, where he has come from? This is our opportunity to find out.' His gaze was passed out equally between the watching group. 'And we have the power to do it. Whether we find out about him or not, we still need information on the alien DNA within him. It's completely foreign, and not made with any kind of materials from Earth. Jack's the only one who will know. If we don't find out in time, we won't be able to make the right antidote. It could have fatal affects if it's wrong.' Owen took a breath. 'So who's with me to save him and find out who he really is?'

Silence settled over the tense Hub. The rest of the team glanced nervously between themselves, questioning._ Is this the right thing to do? We do need the information, but is it right to force him to reveal everything. Is it a risk worth taking? Have we waited long enough? _

As much as Owen's action had been rather unnecessary, Owen did have a point. They needed to sort this out, get their minds clear to help Jack survive the werewolf now imbedded within him. The first process to solving it was to know who Jack really was.

Gwen took a breath, and then stepped confidently forward. 'This is our one chance to find out about him,' she looked at Toshiko and Ianto, urging them to agree. 'This is the only chance we will ever get, if we have to question him anyway, we may as well find out something about him in the process.' It only took less than a few moments for Tosh and Ianto to decide.

--------------

'What are we going to do now? He's still unconscious.'

Owen looked over at Gwen confidently as he made his way to the conference room. 'First of all, we're gonna get together everything we know about Captain Jack.'

-----------------------------

Ianto gazed rather mournfully as he locked the cell door into place. He sighed and decided it was for the best. They had all waited too long for these answers about Jack. It was bound to eventually happen. He turned and left, leaving behind in a cell, a unconscious, un-knowing Jack.

And boy he was going to be pissed when he woke up.

**---------------------------------**

Hope you liked! I havn't written for ages. Hope it wasn't too bodged! Sorry the chapter's a bit long, I think I got carried away..-sweatdrop-

I only managed to write all this because of my wonderful reviewers, so a big thank you to all those who reviewed! So **Please Review!**

Remember, I do not like flames, like many others. If you don't like it, don't read it. A flame is hatred worth nothing. Advice is hope and a new beginning. How do you expect writers to get better if all you do is dis them? Tell them what needs to be improved. Thank you xxx  
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If ya lost, I'm sorry for my rubbish writing skills. Please tell me where I went wrong, and read this.

**FULL RECAP OF STORY in chrono order:**

_Jack's only been a few weeks back from 'the year that never was' to land in trouble. While investigating supernatural happenings in Scotland, Jack sacrifices himself to protect his team and is almost killed in a werewolf attack. Luckily, Jack survives and the Werewolf is stunned and locked up in a Torchwood cell._

_The Captain, now unconscious, has a strange dream involving Golden lights, and him turning into a werewolf and killing his team. _

_He then wakes up in the hub, and slowly realizes the golden light etc. was a dream. He learns that he's slowly becoming a werewolf, but when the team and Jack look at his DNA, they notice that Jack was not even fully human before he was attacked. Jack comes to the silent conclusion that because he was born human, something must have been implanted into his genes somehow, and it's not from the 21st centaury. An implant that he didn't remember having. Now he wonders what happened in the 2 missing years of his life in the Time Agency. They must of experimented._

_Jack is so caught up in shock at this new revelation, doesn't notice Owen until too late. Owen knocks him unconscious with a drug as the werewolf gene inside Jack is already growing, and vulnerable to multiply with stressful situations. The team agrees to talk about, and maybe even find out who Jack really is. Jack is put in the cells. Boy,oh boy, he's not going to be a happy bunny when he wakes up! _


End file.
